The Cocaine Fiends (1936)
This film's purpose is to expose the "Dope Evil", which totally had different connotations 76 years ago, I'm guessing. This little flick was directed by Wm. A. O'Connor and stars Lois January and Noel Madison, which to me sound like 1930s porn names (I'm sure they were nice ladies, regardless).
It's really hard to tell where the quality issues should be applied to - did the original movie have such horribly shot night scenes, or was it from transferring it to video, and then later to DVD? I'll cut the film some slack, since it's so old. But, not for the sound. I'm guessing they miked all the floors or even more likely over-dubbed the walking/running sounds, because they aer so damned loud. That, or everyone in the 30s were wearing tap shoes.
Newsflash, the 'head ache powder' is really dope. I repeat head ache powder is really dope, "co-caine", "kit-kat mix". Also, when on the head ache powder, everything is swell. That is until Nick doesn't marry you, and oh by the way, the hotel you're staying in is really a brothel.
Also, "questing" is an old, seldom used word that means looking or searching. I should tell all my gaming buddings that. They will all be shocked to learn that word and maybe even will start using it...I wonder if we could use it as a noun?
Making whoopy doesn't appear to mean the same thing any longer either. Then - whoopy meant going out and having a swell time, now, it's a nice way of saying that you're getting it on. Swell is used the same way as it was in the 50s through to Happy Days.
Also, just like now, if you don't know how to dance, you will lose the girl to the evil bastard drug dealer every single time. The prettier the girl and the slimier the bastard drug dealer, the faster it happens. Some things never change. I don't know if should feel consoled that I would have been as big a loser in 1936 as I am now, or if it should bother me that even time travel cannot help a guy like me. Note to self, when time machine is invented, learn to dance before going anywhen. Also, beware the dope evil.
As far as this film goes, the women are better actors than the men, across the board. I know that the evils of cocaine or dope or whatever is the aim of the movie and they try to show that dope is at the root of all the evils of society, but what they show in each and every case is bad economics - poor people trying to get a foot up, or rich people out slumming it and wanting to be "tough". I have a hard time buying that doing cocaine leads directly to committing suicide, with a stop on an unmarried pregnancy along the way. Or that doing head ache powder leads directly to prostitution then to murder. Somehow, while the drug dealing men and drug using men thought of as "hard", they are not held to blame for anything that happens to the women who are using the dope, even though in all the cases in this movie, it's the men pressuring this women to do the dope. Funny how that works.
Test Tube Babies (1948)
When I saw how old this film was, I thought it couldn't possibly mean test tube babies in the context I was thinking of, but then the credits role with a nice, full screen statement, "Medical and Technical Data approved and supervised by The NATIONAL RESEARCH FOUNDATION FOR FERTILITY INCORPORATED N
This next line is to the tune of the Brady Bunch theme song.
Here's a story, of George and Kathy, who were living boring little lives.
What can I say about this film? It starts of with a text description of the whole movie and then proceeds to act that description out. Act it out horribly. Horribly acting out the horrible acting of actors acting horribly. And then there's a party at Kathy and George's while George is at the office, and next thing you know there's a cat fight and a topless women. In a 1948 film. I didn't see that coming. And right after this, Kathy and George talk about a divorce, but realize the solution to all of their problems is having a baby. Because that will make George work less. They go to a gynecologist, or as they pronounce it "gee-neh-cologist" and BAM, we're saying Kathy naked. You go 1940s propaganda film! This is also where the sponsorship becomes obvious as they actually discuss Kathy's results and send George to see an Urologist. Of course, we don't see George naked or giving a sample, just a man peering through a microscope.
The next visit is all about artificial insemination. It involves a lecture and a wall chart and some discussion of chromosomes and how the donors are picked. Did I mention that that the doctor is named Dr. Right? Or I guess it could be Write. Whatever. He sounds an awful lot like Rod Serling.
Because it's noticeable for it's absence up to this point, Dr. Right smokes. While the artificial insemination is going on, George pulls one out and smokes it. Humorously, right after the insemination, Dr. Right comes out to tell George it went fine and seems a touch out of breath and sits down on the corner of the desk and has a post (artificial) coital cigarette. Of course the effort works and next thing you know, George is at the hospital chain smoking while Kathy is in labor. The doctor comes out to comfort him and actually sends George away to buy smokes for both of them.
Due to the film being spliced together, I hope because of bad spots, we go right from the above scene to a voiced over speech in a nursery full of babies. From there the next scene is George and Kathy five years later, with three kids and both saying how happy they are, which cuts to a message saying to go see your obstetrician if you want ot get pregnant - I'm only paraphrasing a little bit on that.
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